when i die

when i die

when i diewhen i’m gonewhen i’m deadand gonemourn for mekeen and wailkick and cry don’t toastdon’t singdon’t celebratedon’t praisekeen and wailbawl, howlsnivel, blubberand moan it was not my timeit was not for the besti did not want to goi did not blowthe scene i did not surrenderi did not succumbi did not go to resti …

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kintsukuroi

before a thing can be whole,there must be shards,scattered and smothered before a mirror can be whole,it must be broken before a thing can be kintsugi,it must be kintsukuroi, in the hallway is a mirror,while passing this mirror,we raised our fist,and we broke it smash smash smash. like a hammer,like a broken hammer pieces of …

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Cobalt Blues

let us now sing the cobalt bluesthat we may emerge from ourchronic circadian desynchronization,that we consider and wonder how it isthat every 2, every 7, every 9 weeks,our bodies obliterated and re-formed,regurgitated and re-born ofarchaic remnants of ancestors let us now wonderwhere but in the dark matter of space?where but in the collective conscience?where but …

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Ethel

ashes

She’s in a nursing home and I’m waiting for her to die. Every few months I get a phone call from them that always starts the same way, “I’m calling about your mother but don’t worry, she’s fine.” Better luck next time, I always think. Usually they just need permission for something like a change …

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alps loiterer

literal prose:we know how this endsdeath smiles every time they visitto datethey have been responsiveto our refusalto participate they usually comesin biker blackfaded leatherwhite pillsleather jeans oral reptiles:we know how this startedderivative sins it always goes the samewe might thinkthe frequency mightmake it easiermight make right but not we know they’re therein plain sightall we …

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My Echo, My Shadow, and Me

I am a sixty-one-year-old white male of English and Irish descent. I have a genetic disposition for acne, baldness and depression. I am taller than average and slender. Clothing rarely fits me well. I was lied to as a child and things were done to me that should never be done to another human being. …

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Design as Snobbery

“Design as Art” by Bruno Munari is as insufferable as it is inspiring. My experience as a graphic designer is long, not deep. I’ve been designing part-time for more than twenty years but sporadically and not to the degree that I could call myself more than a novice. I love doing it and have created …

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fruit lady

This is an ekphrastic poem about a sculpture by John Martini. in her previous lifeshe held up the roofof a high school gymnasium she misses the sneaker chirpsand the thap thap thapof bouncing orange ballsless than she enjoysbeing upright in the sunbearing only the weightof an imaginary fruit bowlon her upturned head with her sculptedmuscular …

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Running A Way

I run into Mark in the Cap’n Kidd. I believe I have to die, I say to Mark. We’re drinking Bud long necks at the bar. We all have to die, Mark answers. Of course but that’s not what I mean. What do you mean? It feels like I have to die in order to …

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is that all there is?

the universe emergedfrom the gapbetween my scapulaeand follows meeveryam where I go a hovering entiretyabove behind my headwhirling devilishlyI shall never it see I took up yogatwisting asana (plural)and meditation (singular)with open eyesin the front of the mirror and yet stillI only sense the gapfrom which it escapedme Tags: meditation, memoir, scapulae, yoga